Before I was never close to my mom.
I was two weeks old when I started to live with
my grandparents and great grandmother.
My parents were first year medical university students, six year to study
And I was sent to live at my grandmother's house.
I have seen for almost seven years unique people,
Things and places not everyone will ever see.
I have seen it,
It made me calm.
And my mom, she was different,
I call my grandmother "mama".
Only in front of people I call my mother "mom".
My grandmother said, both of us didn't feel like mother and a child.
So, my mom, to me she was crazy,
Always gardening, farming in our apartment,
Fighting with my father,
He left when I was twelve,
And she made it forever divorce,
Mad at me and my sister, just for mentioning my father's name.
All school was miserable, this why I didn't want to go to school learn English.
It was gossip, jealous people, women talking about my mother fighting with my father's second wife,
The second wife was making stories about us,
They were doctors, everyone knew us in our small poor city where I looked and dressed better than most, the way I was.
And my mom with chickens and pig, gardens,
She thought we would starve.
My sister had to live with my grandmother for more than a year,
I was spending most of the time at school, art school, grandmother's house and hospital.
With my mom listening how things are horrible, children ungrateful,
Most of the time she even was working and teaching in medical college, we didn't have money.
I was fourteen when I started to work.
So it was like this.
Only now, when I am mother myself,
We became closer, I started to understand her.
Like you have kid and you have to push and push him every second until he is eighteen.
You forget about you, personality changes...
I started to feel sorry for my mom at that time.
On one side I didn't want to be like her,
Some stuff I let it go, forgive without thinking,
On other, she is very active,
Loves nature and nature loves her back.
Everything just grows in our garden.
And I remember my grandmother's words:
We go were God wants us to go...
