Poetess :
Well my friends..
Once upon a time far far away. ..
Good job, you two lie down here ..
There was a young beautiful women. .
Inner voice : are you sure?
Poetess : Shh, they will forget everything in the morning.
(Baby and two dogs are sleeping).
Once upon a time far far away. ..
Good job, you two lie down here ..
There was a young beautiful women. .
Inner voice : are you sure?
Poetess : Shh, they will forget everything in the morning.
(Baby and two dogs are sleeping).
In the
morning.
Poetess :
the story was a huge success.
Parts of it were written in bathrooms all over the city.
We are for healthy humor, right?
Okay, let's go.
(Leaves outside with a dog).
Parts of it were written in bathrooms all over the city.
We are for healthy humor, right?
Okay, let's go.
(Leaves outside with a dog).
Poetess : we
take onion, garlic, sour cream, mix together and boil, mix again and leave on
the face for a week..
Inner voice : I am going for a walk to another country.
Poetess : ops, wrong story.
(looking on napkins and wipes)
Poetess : today, today, today!
Inner voice: Will be back in ten hours,
Hopefully she will finish this "don't know story".
And will go back to her real job, business card,
How to get rid of headache and insomnia with help of mushrooms.
It helps, you know,
Only go around with mushroom your head.
Test everything person...
Poetess : All I want is money.
God: I beat she is talking to me.
Inner voice : I think she was absent when the teacher was talking about idiots.
Poetess : idioms.
Inner voice : I am leaving.
Leaves with honey and apple sauce on the face.
God: money, money, money...
What about prosperity, truth, history?
Everyone is quite.
Poetess : I'll make a note.
God: fine, take the number.
Poetess : one and six zeroes,
My dream of an idiot!
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
God: that's number in the money line.
Poetess : and what to do?
God: stay and wait.
And no tricking me with cutting zeroes on the dollar bill.
Inner voice : I am going for a walk to another country.
Poetess : ops, wrong story.
(looking on napkins and wipes)
Poetess : today, today, today!
Inner voice: Will be back in ten hours,
Hopefully she will finish this "don't know story".
And will go back to her real job, business card,
How to get rid of headache and insomnia with help of mushrooms.
It helps, you know,
Only go around with mushroom your head.
Test everything person...
Poetess : All I want is money.
God: I beat she is talking to me.
Inner voice : I think she was absent when the teacher was talking about idiots.
Poetess : idioms.
Inner voice : I am leaving.
Leaves with honey and apple sauce on the face.
God: money, money, money...
What about prosperity, truth, history?
Everyone is quite.
Poetess : I'll make a note.
God: fine, take the number.
Poetess : one and six zeroes,
My dream of an idiot!
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
God: that's number in the money line.
Poetess : and what to do?
God: stay and wait.
And no tricking me with cutting zeroes on the dollar bill.
Poetess :
back to my beautiful story.
Inner voice : what are you talking about grandpa?
Poetess : I am grandma and .. Thank you very much!
Inner voice : It's 207.. are we ...at least?
Poetess : you are at home,
Were do you think you are?
My photographs are every where.
Inner voice : did the maid made dinner?
Poetess : I am ... (swears) cooking for fifty years. .
Inner voice : that's home for sure..
Poetess : today I am writing the happy ending..
What am I talking about?
With you (to Inner voice ) I forgot everything,
Fine, I make healthy dinner as usual,
Carrot with those green things on top and soup from peas.
Back to 199..
Inner voice ( to great grand daughters): I wasn't even born yet.
Poetess ( to Inner voice ) : you can talk about the weather.
And the real witch left,
She said, she has reputation in the govern ..(reading a postal card, stops at the middle of the last word).
Inner voice : what are you talking about grandpa?
Poetess : I am grandma and .. Thank you very much!
Inner voice : It's 207.. are we ...at least?
Poetess : you are at home,
Were do you think you are?
My photographs are every where.
Inner voice : did the maid made dinner?
Poetess : I am ... (swears) cooking for fifty years. .
Inner voice : that's home for sure..
Poetess : today I am writing the happy ending..
What am I talking about?
With you (to Inner voice ) I forgot everything,
Fine, I make healthy dinner as usual,
Carrot with those green things on top and soup from peas.
Back to 199..
Inner voice ( to great grand daughters): I wasn't even born yet.
Poetess ( to Inner voice ) : you can talk about the weather.
And the real witch left,
She said, she has reputation in the govern ..(reading a postal card, stops at the middle of the last word).
Not everything
I should know.
Poetess :
remembered that time
When I started to write,
When I was quite like a fish,
Don't know was my middle name,
Nick name was given name.
Inner voice : the weather is nice.
Poetess : thirty years ago I promised to finish it,
And it's almost done.
Here is the book.
Read here and here, my granddaughter nude pictures .. and today's news.
Skip the middle, sorry for few stains,
I was cooking.
When I started to write,
When I was quite like a fish,
Don't know was my middle name,
Nick name was given name.
Inner voice : the weather is nice.
Poetess : thirty years ago I promised to finish it,
And it's almost done.
Here is the book.
Read here and here, my granddaughter nude pictures .. and today's news.
Skip the middle, sorry for few stains,
I was cooking.
The real
witch : congratulations!
Where this beauty?
Poetess : I haven't finish it, was busy fixing my phone yesterday.
People take my one stuff and bring it back in two pieces.
Inner voice : She is writing at work.
The real witch : is that the real reason? Slacker..
Poetess :. .and they were complaining,
And I was sympathetic and I did something with my middle finger.
I should just stay who I am, I don't care and say it.
The real witch : how rude.
Poetess : then a bee got stuck in my hair.
The real witch : may be the bee thought you are a flower?
Poetess ( smiling): thank you. ..
The real witch: What are those round things in your shoes?
Poetess : to massage my shoes at night.
The real witch : cake!
Poetess ( covers her mouth and reads sign on the cake ) : Memory Dick!
The real witch : I knew you will like it!
It's part of your art.
Poetess : memory stick is part of my art!
The real witch : you know, you should speak clearly some times.
Inner voice : I think I am only one who is normal here.
Where this beauty?
Poetess : I haven't finish it, was busy fixing my phone yesterday.
People take my one stuff and bring it back in two pieces.
Inner voice : She is writing at work.
The real witch : is that the real reason? Slacker..
Poetess :. .and they were complaining,
And I was sympathetic and I did something with my middle finger.
I should just stay who I am, I don't care and say it.
The real witch : how rude.
Poetess : then a bee got stuck in my hair.
The real witch : may be the bee thought you are a flower?
Poetess ( smiling): thank you. ..
The real witch: What are those round things in your shoes?
Poetess : to massage my shoes at night.
The real witch : cake!
Poetess ( covers her mouth and reads sign on the cake ) : Memory Dick!
The real witch : I knew you will like it!
It's part of your art.
Poetess : memory stick is part of my art!
The real witch : you know, you should speak clearly some times.
Inner voice : I think I am only one who is normal here.
Inner voice
: my beauties!
Which one now?
Girls from one year old to ... are running around.
Calendar shows 205...
Audience : twenty years ago we would. ..them.
Now, we want to see what happens!
Inner voice : where are my binoculars or magnifying glass?
Poetess : I don't know where are the cats!
Would you stop bothering me with cats,
I am already tired of cleaning ...
Three times a day he asks me where are the cats,
Check outside somewhere.
I am writing "don't know ... fiction story".
Next will be called "don't care" and "don't care at .."
Wonder how long it will take me to write.
Audience : take all the ...time!
Poetess : it's 205..
Inner voice : are you ...crazy.
Poetess : may be I should write about my life changing day..
Inner voice : I want to change only one thing.
Poetess : a diaper?
Inner voice : not in my age.
Poetess : me...
"Slat" (cat): she sounds happy here.
"Smoothie kiss" (dog): she is always like this.
He (points at Inner voice) says it's ...
"Barbie" (hamster): I heard a story about my great great.. grandpa "Barbie"...
"Smoothie kiss": I was getting so much massage, now I have to be rubbed with oil for ... spots.
Inner voice ( chokes ) : No, I am interested only in my great grand daughters.
Where is our "Milky cow"?
Poetess (with three bottles of milk): I am here
The real witch : what is my name?
Is he asking me what is my name?
Poetess : I am sure he is asking someone else.
The real witch : and who?
I would like to know myself.
Poetess ( to Prince ) : throw some money at her,
She will like it.
The real witch : he better have an idea,
We are on a romantic date here.
Poetess : I am happy!
I had a dream about Donald Trump becoming next President.
Inner voice : what about Hilary,
Aren't you women supposed to support each other.
The real witch : what are you feading him?
He has this weird ideas that people are friends,
and people and animals are friends.
I am not going to be friend with a shark.
Inner voice : we have to realize we are all have to love and respect each other.
Personally I think I would love only beautiful women. .
We have to trust and appreciate each other.
(Checking door with five locks).
Inner voice : where are my beauties!
Three giant german sheppards are wagging tails.
Inner voice : did you drink milk before going to bed?
The dogs lie down near the door.
Inner voice : time to meditate.
I am calm, I am very calm, I am calm like never before
(Repeats five hundred times ).
The dogs are barking.
Inner voice : if my puppies will bark one more time tonight,
I am going to buy one more lock, gun and dog...
Poetess : Men are so selfish.
All they want to be surprised in bed and kitchen.
What about being surprised on the road while driving.
No, honking.
May be there is a secret meaning
When a woman sitting at the middle of intersection on red light?
Or signaling right and driving straight?
I almost left the car and key.
Here, you metal hat.
Inner voice : thank you, is it double protection?
Poetess : I am beginning on my knees about my wish to come true.
Inner voice : if I be dressed would it help.
We all, two, have to help each other.
Which one now?
Girls from one year old to ... are running around.
Calendar shows 205...
Audience : twenty years ago we would. ..them.
Now, we want to see what happens!
Inner voice : where are my binoculars or magnifying glass?
Poetess : I don't know where are the cats!
Would you stop bothering me with cats,
I am already tired of cleaning ...
Three times a day he asks me where are the cats,
Check outside somewhere.
I am writing "don't know ... fiction story".
Next will be called "don't care" and "don't care at .."
Wonder how long it will take me to write.
Audience : take all the ...time!
Poetess : it's 205..
Inner voice : are you ...crazy.
Poetess : may be I should write about my life changing day..
Inner voice : I want to change only one thing.
Poetess : a diaper?
Inner voice : not in my age.
Poetess : me...
"Slat" (cat): she sounds happy here.
"Smoothie kiss" (dog): she is always like this.
He (points at Inner voice) says it's ...
"Barbie" (hamster): I heard a story about my great great.. grandpa "Barbie"...
"Smoothie kiss": I was getting so much massage, now I have to be rubbed with oil for ... spots.
Inner voice ( chokes ) : No, I am interested only in my great grand daughters.
Where is our "Milky cow"?
Poetess (with three bottles of milk): I am here
The real witch : what is my name?
Is he asking me what is my name?
Poetess : I am sure he is asking someone else.
The real witch : and who?
I would like to know myself.
Poetess ( to Prince ) : throw some money at her,
She will like it.
The real witch : he better have an idea,
We are on a romantic date here.
Poetess : I am happy!
I had a dream about Donald Trump becoming next President.
Inner voice : what about Hilary,
Aren't you women supposed to support each other.
The real witch : what are you feading him?
He has this weird ideas that people are friends,
and people and animals are friends.
I am not going to be friend with a shark.
Inner voice : we have to realize we are all have to love and respect each other.
Personally I think I would love only beautiful women. .
We have to trust and appreciate each other.
(Checking door with five locks).
Inner voice : where are my beauties!
Three giant german sheppards are wagging tails.
Inner voice : did you drink milk before going to bed?
The dogs lie down near the door.
Inner voice : time to meditate.
I am calm, I am very calm, I am calm like never before
(Repeats five hundred times ).
The dogs are barking.
Inner voice : if my puppies will bark one more time tonight,
I am going to buy one more lock, gun and dog...
Poetess : Men are so selfish.
All they want to be surprised in bed and kitchen.
What about being surprised on the road while driving.
No, honking.
May be there is a secret meaning
When a woman sitting at the middle of intersection on red light?
Or signaling right and driving straight?
I almost left the car and key.
Here, you metal hat.
Inner voice : thank you, is it double protection?
Poetess : I am beginning on my knees about my wish to come true.
Inner voice : if I be dressed would it help.
We all, two, have to help each other.
Poetess: we
should do things together!
Inner voice (to himself): everyday is a crisis
here...
Poetess (to the audience): he is only one and
only .. and who is present here,
I want to thank for everything (reading list
of everything, 3 seconds)
Some one else couldn't attend.
Every night I am personally thanking this
amazing person non stop, shaking hand and hugging.
And I want you to see his beautiful face.
Audience: he is naked!
Poetess (dreamingly): I can't forget the
moment when I took this picture.
Inner voice (dreaming): when did I take this
picture?
Poetess: I can show you movie about us
(showing paper).
Poetess (reading from the paper): what if some
one want to make a movie about me?
Inner voice: it will be easy, ten minutes is
good enough to watch at lunch in museums.
Poetess: what about the actress?
Inner voice: one quality.
Poetess (dreamingly): beautiful..thank you
(whispering).
Inner voice: no.
Poetess (dreamingly with smile): intelligent..
Inner voice: no.
Poetess: there is nothing else!
Inner voice: crazy.
Poetess: can at least a black woman play me?
Inner voice: Welcome to the club!
Poetess (looking around) : it's empty here?
Inner voice : you are the first one.
Poetess is thinking what to say.
Inner voice : you are asking too many questions.
Why didn't you stay in the forest any way?
I am sure, wild bears would love you.
Poetess : I wanted to work in the office.
Poetess is lying in the bath tab and watching movie.
Paintings on the wall, ice cream and educational magazines.
She is drinking orange juice.
We will be nice here.
The phone starts to ring.
Poetess : Good day..
Inner voice : why are you not at work?
It's Friday, lady.
Poetess : my back, I mean my butt, my belly..
(To herself ) faking all the time.
Inner voice : wake up already,
We are at work actually.
( Moving cup with change closer to the road).
Poetess : do you like my writing,
How I write?
Inner voice (pretending he is dreaming): what?
Poetess : I was thinking,
Any poets who are living has more chances to write a beautiful story,
Like doing better then great poets who are gone.
So I am doing better than Shakespeare..
Inner voice : What's your real job?
Poetess : I should write it's a fun fiction story,
Because people will think that I am writing my daily experiences here.
Inner voice : It's fake people!
Poetess : Everything is going to be great for people
I love and like.
Inner voice : I am already here.
Poetess : and why are you taking your clothes off?
Inner voice : can't be any closer..
Poetess: I wrote a story!
Inner voice: I am sure middle aged women will be very happy.
Poetess: what middle age?
I am not even sixty.
Inner voice: I hate working too.
Poetess (thinking of where to hide weights at work): what's wrong with it?
Inner voice: being a nice person at my work is a curse.
Poetess: I read in newspaper about some company,
Few employees got poisoned and they sued the company.
The fridge didn't work all weekend, first thing on Monday, bym..
Inner voice: we are not so lucky.
Poetess: I wrote a story (looking at the mirror) about some one else
And I think I need professional advise about where shall I go with it.
Inner voice: I have a friend for that.
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: what's your name boy?
Poetess: boy? Irina.
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: the mostest and importenest thing is grammar
And you have to know what a h..eck you are talking about.
Poetess (writing): the mostest importenest thing..
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: yes, I was surprised myself
When the nurse started to take off my clothes.
Poetess: the nurse?
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: no, the horse was after, or before...
Let me think my beautiful ladies.
Poetess (kind of melting with a smile): thank you...
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: me to, I am thanking only the ambulance.
I was writing a poem about farm,
Special edition Mister Taker had a horse, pig, chickens and pit bulls,
I had to ride all of them myself,
Grandma with stupid questions, she was the last one.
Poetess: you were riding grandma?
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: she said she was single.
We have to trust people.
Mister Taker had something else too, but since the children might read,
We can't talk about any weapons, especially illegal.
It was a poem for the police.
Nice detective, gave me a pillow to sit down,
We were writing for a year..
Poetess: and what happened?
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry: Peter? who is Peter?
You?
Poetess : my name is Irina.
Specialist in women, dogs and poetry :
What I was doing in the air?
I was asking this question myself:
What I am doing in the air with a laundry bag?
What am I doing in the air at all.
Five minutes, lovely conversation between birds and myself.
Wind must be changed the direction,
That was the third nurse explanation,
The one with wings didn't explain anything,
Told me to get ... out and start .. working.
And I am working my friends,
Teaching children and adults,
We are writing new story
" Penguin versus Trax, the dinosaur"..
Poetess : let's shake this old dirty bag for some news.
(Shaking the bag): hmm, money!
You know, I save shit every where
And then I don't remember where I saved it.
Inner voice : you know, you have never written me a beautiful love poem.
Poetess : about what?
Inner voice ( loud with questions in the voice) : pardon me?!
Poetess ( suspiciously ): about us?
Inner voice : you wrote about cabbages..
Poetess : it was for my Golden cabbage award.
Inner voice : wrote about fish and chips, one week dinner, wrote about cheesecake.
Poetess : cheesecake?
Inner voice : yeah, the one was on my face.
Poetess (happily): may be we were doing something romantic?!
Inner voice : not with the box.
Poetess (loud): since I paid the price
(showing a bus ticket $3,75),
The Golden cabbage award is better to be mine.
I will be slightly dressed on my ears and
Will read my best poem of the year:
They were f..ing all over the place...all night ..
Inner voice (chokes on a cup of tea): who? us?
Poetess : no! the dogs!
I am writing only about reality,
Puppies and kittens are my mom's home business.
Poetess is napping in the bathroom (work).
Poetess (mad): the witches are bothering me all day.
Screaming my name like I do something wrong
When I do nothing at all.
I already think something bad
And all it was some call to help.
This how they talk.
Inner voice : good morning mad woman!
Poetess: I forgot what I wanted to write.
Inner voice : may be so f..k them but not literally.
The real witch : and would you stop using word witch please for any wild female at your work place.
Thank goodness I don't have to work.
Poetess : my piggy bank.
Inner voice : why is it bigger then a baby cow?
Poetess is holding the Golden Cabbage award:
Thank you very much the cabbage new owner, me,..
I have everything, all I want is the money.
Poetess again: I didn't write it?
Spanish woman from work is smiling shyly:
Donald Trump lover not literally... linda.
Every one is laughing, especially the Spanish woman,
And the laughing sounds like ..
Poetess ( covers her mouth):
This why I think about witches ..
In the gym.
Poetess: I want to get in shape and start running again,
Like marathon.
Inner voice : then you have to do it,
Not talk about it!
Every one is sweating near air conditioner,
Poetess and Inner voice are drinking hot coffee.
Poetess looks little bit ... but apparently red home made lipstick makes a huge difference.
Please don't ask her the receipe because no man in ... will ...her..
Inner voice : why so many dots? Will be a surprise!?
Poetess: it's hot and then you gain weight too.
I have to watch programs about obesity and what it does to force myself go to the gym...
Inner voice : What's on your head?
A tail ?! Whose tail?!
Poetess swear a little
Mister Lottery : why don't you kiss me?
Not in the cheek!
Not in the lips either!
Almost every one (nervous): where, where to kiss?!
Inner voice : I am like elephant,
I remember shit..
I forget only where I left my keys,
Where I left my phone, where I left my wallet,
Where I parked the car..
What am I talking about?
In the bus.
Grandma witch, mama witch and sister witch are waiting for papa witch.
Inner voice is holding garlic, onion, carrot, potatoes, salt and paper for protection.
Grandma witch (knowledgeably): that's to make soup.
Inner voice mumbles something unclear.
Sister witch: one "dream of an idiot" came true.
Poetess: why this bus has two different numbers on it?
Inner voice (thinking): why do I always want more then any one else?
Poetess: I don't know what to write here,
I don't know much about witches,
It will be unfinished story.
Inner voice (starts to worry): what?
(Nicely): don't you have few girlfriends at work.
Go, spend some time together..
Friends to each other: we are here to help our friend,
So stuff your face in the mud.
Beautiful lady is reading a book "How turn beautiful lady into a frog"
On the vacation.
Inner voice : you said you want everything to be natural!!!
Poetess : A bear!? Wolves!?! House on the cliff?!!
Bushes?! Where is the bath room?!
Inner voice: in the bushes..
Poetess: Buenos Aires! ( translator: good morning!)
Inner voice: Buenos Aires! (good morning!)
Poetess: what happened?
You look like you had fight with lion and lost..
Inner voice: what about with a smaller animal?
Poetess : like a cat?
Inner voice : yes, like a cat..
Audience: is the story will ever be finished or we have to listen it until we ..?
Inner voice: I feel great today!
Audience: stupid subscribe forever button.
Inner voice: where is my binoculars?
Audience: what are you going to do now?!
Are you going to read it again?!
Inner voice: I feel great today..
Open your eyes like bird open wings. .
Lie down with a woman and ... (hides paper from Playboy)
Audience: and!?
Inner voice: Oh, sorry, wrong paper..
Grand kids, you know.. university exams,
Have to babysit... they are burning my stuff..
Okay, here..
Poetess ( holding cabbage in front of the audience) Thank you very much for this award,
It means a lot to me!
Inner voice ( clapping hands proudly): We are going to have cabbage for dinner!
Inner voice kicks the entrance door, throws his jacket and bags with food, dog food, cat food, hamster treats and special bag with other items on the floor and shouts:
I am home slats!
The slats: are you fucking out of your mind!?
Inner voice ( thinking at the same time as the slats are speaking): I fucking out of my mind!
The sluts: let him go to the store alone and he comes back completely insane.
Inner voice (thinking): I am completely insane!
The sluts: he is drunk!
Inner voice ( thinking ): I am drunk!
Hamster, cat and dog are waiting.
Inner voice: my beauties,
I didn't know you are home..
I ate uncooked mushroom I think. ..
"Smotchie kiss" (the dog's name):
Good thing they don't fight too long ....looove. ...
Almost my massage time..
"Slat" (the cat): I am pregnant.
They gave me this name and think
I will go outside and will mind my own business?
But with the black cat?.. on the pine trees at the rush hour?!
I had never expected that from myself ..
"Barbie" (the hamster): fucking bullshit,
No one checks anything.
Running every day in pink clothes, in the pink wheel,
In the pink hamster house,
And I am a fucking boy!
Then every one shakes me (shakes his feet like it's thunderstorm): where are the babies?!
"Slat" ( the cat): you can play with mine..
"Smotchie kiss " (the dog): listen Barbie..
Inner voice:
I am apologizing, this is the last post for Don't know story.
Our writer is writing the happy ending.
Every time I ask her, when is it finally over,
She says: I don't know.
And another great news,
I got married.
Finally, I am a freedom man!
Back to the beginning.
To the day I met ... this talent (reading a text).
I called her on the phone after reading all night one poem trying to
figure out what's is going on.
Next day she arrived in an ambulance.
Already, I asked myself?
Our beloved grandma is a head doctor, honey.
I saw her and literally fell in love with her cooking and smile.
A dream of every man!.
(Looking at the side, just like my wife).
Next day at 7:01 some one broke my double door with fifteen locks,
It's ghetto, I am wearing a bulletproof jacket.
A man dressed in black Adidas and a woman with Marlboro.
Cowboys?!
Man: you didn't call at 7 pm
Inner voice: It's 7:01..
Man: at 6:59 you supposed to dial the last number, it takes a minute for
call go through in our city.
Woman: maybe he is an idiot?
Inner voice is nodding his head fast in agreement.
Man: no problem, next times would you please be so kind and call on
time.
Inner voice : next times?!
Inner voice is nodding his head in agreement.
The woman is fixing her bra and making her underwear look longer.
Inner voice closes his eyes.
Woman: do you like my top and shirt too?
Man: we are businesses, we have to support each other!
My business card " Once a month security group".
One more student for you, my girlfriend.
Teach her how to sing like Beethoven.
Inner voice: was he writing music?
Woman: like a dog?
(movie "Beethoven")
Inner voice ( on the phone):
My darling, how is doing my sweetheart,
I am your little pumpkin flying on wings of love.
Dreaming of landing soon to have dinner with my sugar apple..
No, I am not calling from jail!
Speaking about dinner. ..
This how I met my beautiful poetess..
Don't know what I was thinking that day reading her first poem..
Memories appears in the air, like vision.
Poem number one.
(Inner voice talking to himself.
Who writes like this?
One hundred seventy pages, that's easy,
Poems born on the streets ..).
Kitchen, husband and wife are having dinner
(Inner voice: how nice!)
...Husband: what a fuck is it?
Wife: chicken!
Husband: Why is it fucking alive?!
Wife: Why don't you fucking cook!
Here, take your stupid cook book.
(Throws the book at him)
Your birthday gift!
(Inner voice: She got a birthday gift,
He must loves her,
Love poems are my specialty, been married eight times.. officially.
Husband: Come here!
Wife: Come in your pants!
Husband ( thinking which one of two words that starts at letter
"b" he knows for women to use.
His own inner voice is thinking now,
Father in law is in military,
Yes daddy!
Everything else considers a reason to run away,
Grandmother with three bulldogs,
Stepbrother is a businessman,
Mother in law..
Own inner voice:... not gonna make it..
Husband: Beautiful!
(Inner voice wiping tears of joy).
Wife: let's go watch my favourite movies
( She is easy going, after few years)
Inner voice: how romantic, pained picture with words,
Small city, innocent people,
Calling to the author..
Inner voice beautifully enters the skiing arena,
And after triple twist he stops at the middle:
She likes figure skating..
Today we are going to read poems about (trying to understand what's
written on a napkin) our economy? (question in voice).
Our economy. ..
The bestest ever, the awesomest in the world?
Tomato! My favourite vegetable!
Gracias Senioras, Gracias!
What's is this?
Letter to myself written in the economy class instead of writing
notes,
Because our economy su..
Well. it has nothing to do with love.
Today I am going to read our (corrects fast ) hers new poems about love.
Who tough her how to write poetry?
(Proudly) No one, doesn't it show!
Home made poet.
They didn't take her to music school,
My beloved poetess didn't know how to knock the wood in rhyme.. writing
poems now!
She is away today,
Had to take a flight all over the world..
She forgot to say
I love you in the morning..
To her baby (laughs )
Inner voice: Thank you ...
Who should I thank first...
She finished her book!
It took (counting fingers and toes) years...
Welcome to our submarine,
This night we are going to have lots of fun reading her three stories.
Poetess (almost naked): Thank you. .
Inner voice (proudly): My advise,
So no one will .. think what .. our poets read...
Inner voice ( looking extremely fresh ).
Had vacation in the forest..
What did you put in the soup?
( looking on the box "love potion from 6 to 9 am" and hiding).
( To himself, that a good lane..
It's dinner time and I am making soup for you my love..
Going to be a new love poem (exited)
What did you put in the soup? ( throwing in the garbage).
You don't need it, my advice make a smart face (crossing eyes) and
don't t
(Thinking) I think he said clearly on multiple occasions, he wants to
have a bitch, not a witch!
Immigrants...
Open my dictionary:
Bitches are approaching roughly at the middle of the night
When all you want to see are dreams... cute puppies playing in the
garden..See because of you I have to call one..
(To the crowd):
My friends,
I should've chosen another career..
When I had a chance and
Let Donald entertain my beautiful poetess..
(Jumps away discussed) Dirty mop...my face...that's not very hygienic. .
Poetess: Well, I like Donald Trump...
Inner voice: I meant Donald from Disney, Daisy! The same we are
watching with J for a year now.
(to the crowd):
She bought only one Disney cartoon to her son a year ago (laughs)
(Mothers support group shows picture of the inner voice to a suspicious
man in a shirt with a big sign "mafia business")
Inner voice: Of course I like Donald Tramp!
(Crowd): what is she drinking?
Inner voice: let me see (opens the fridge): orange juice, milk, mango
juice, coffee, tomato juice..
Trying to leave the stage:
She is only child (wears glasses) . ..a woman of her era..
She was volunteering at her father's (whispers) .. office for four
years.
Crowd nods in support and reaches together for wallets.(Inner voice
always asks for money, helping himself)
Crowd (loud): and what happened to those people?
Inner voice ( walking around with huge piggy bank):
Thank you, thank you!
Strangely, 100 percent recovery.
Either way, I sense, soon we all will have a lot of fun..
(Runs fast away)..
Inner voice is relaxing on top of a palm..
Story time:
Two islands,
First with one hundred men and one woman,
And the woman is Queen on throne.
Second island,
One hundred women and one man.
The man is sitting on top of the palm.
Poetess: you left me!
Inner voice: you look so b...(measuring her weight) b....(trying to say
something, coughs) beautiful. .
Poetess: I am in good mood.
Inner voice : That's new!
Poetess: I realized, I can't be ..feel moody,
Because I can't write my b.. (measuring sense of the poems).b.. (trying
to say something) beautiful poems..
I am writing this new poem about him having energy and healthy glow and
all I could think
Is him having adrenaline. .
Inner voice: can someone publish finally her boo?
Inner voice, lying down on the ocean beach.
Smiling happy trough sunglasses,
Chokes a second:
Whata. ...
His beloved poetess walking to him,
Dressed in sport sweater and let's call it leggings.
Poetess: I forgot to wear a skirt today!
Inner voice looking for place to hide (sand or ocean)
I can see it my dear..
Poetess:
I am stuck with myself,
Before I used to write freely,
How many unreadable poems I wrote
Without mentioning my name,
Every one is happy, holes are covered witrh leaves,
Just trying to be me a crazy women,
Now with my new girlfriends at work..
Inner voice:
Women! You don't like them! Here go, problem solved...
Poetess: not even one smart thought today
Inner voice: you had a thought going to gym..
I don't see your old stories by the way.
What? New stuff?
God: Oh, God
Inner voice is checking his pulse.
Inner voice: building my new life in Africa!
Yesterday bought one-way ticket.
(suspiciously looking around)...women
What are doing?!
Poetess is funny dancing 90s dance (special "say bye to 90s week or
never say at all"),
pop music in a foreign language is playing.
Inner voice: my old lady..
Martini bottle (with a cigar): all men are the same.
Pick any one, wont make a mistake.
Bottle of beer: get fat, my advice,
(eating a double burger) and stinky and .. hairy.. (wipes tears).
Bottle of vodka: dance, baby, dance!!!
(poetess is dancing tango)
Poetess: I am not writing poems no more!
Inner voice (looking up): thank you, thank you,
After twenty years of asking why I was blind that day, my dream came
true!
(dancing with poetess).
Poetess: I am writing a screen play.
Inner voice: about what my friend (kissing a frog),
My green beauty.
Poetess: my life
Inner voice: don't mention my name
Inner voice is reading morning newspaper,
Skipping pages with naked women.
Show me some one dressed,
96x95x110
Call me..is it my own number..
(Phone call)
Woman: I am calling about your add
"Birthday wishes and more",
I would like to know about ..and more part..
Inner voice with a sign
"Predict future".
Woman: I want to meet a firefighter,
They make lots of money.
Inner voice: Start a fire,
You will meet a firefighter.
Then you will meet a detective,
Then a lawyer,
Then a judge.
Woman claps hands and leaves to nearby gas station.
Poetess: All men, two I had,
We're rude to me and when I left,
They were crying begging back.
Inner voice: That's your karma.
Inner voice : and this how I decided to become a farmer.
Close to nature, my childhood dream, not by choice of course..
Strangers: first time see this kind of creativity.
Absolutely next level.
Different color pots.
Inner voice: you might notice each one have a nick name and a poem...
Strangers (rewriting everything): so where did you get these nice pieces of home decore ( playing with the lamp switches).
Do you mind if we take a few pictures here and there.
What's the size of shiny paper you used to cover the windows?
Inner voice : 90x60x90, my favourite.
Strangers: if you decide to farm again in a .. couple of years.., call us, we farm together.
What is the address, stop by to say hi?
Inner voice giving detailed address.
Strangers: ..knock the door ten times after ten.
Mention your name..
Any weapons you think?
Inner voice: lovely dog.
How many people live in the house?
About twenty and all are cousins...
And how many days you are farming here?
Inner voice: one day officers.
Close to nature, my childhood dream, not by choice of course..
Strangers: first time see this kind of creativity.
Absolutely next level.
Different color pots.
Inner voice: you might notice each one have a nick name and a poem...
Strangers (rewriting everything): so where did you get these nice pieces of home decore ( playing with the lamp switches).
Do you mind if we take a few pictures here and there.
What's the size of shiny paper you used to cover the windows?
Inner voice : 90x60x90, my favourite.
Strangers: if you decide to farm again in a .. couple of years.., call us, we farm together.
What is the address, stop by to say hi?
Inner voice giving detailed address.
Strangers: ..knock the door ten times after ten.
Mention your name..
Any weapons you think?
Inner voice: lovely dog.
How many people live in the house?
About twenty and all are cousins...
And how many days you are farming here?
Inner voice: one day officers.
Inner voice : cheating on my wife? Never!
(Taking clothes off)
Carrot: I am your wife, st..d (bites her tongue).
Smart book: No fight before sex, this is not healthy.
Inner voice: day dreaming? This is not healthy.
(looking for a porno movie).
Carrot: hockey again? (looking on the movie cover).
Every day, this is not healthy.
Inner voice : I want something hot baby! Give me something hot!
Carrot: ..on the gas stove..(looking at the gas stove)
Inner voice: Don’t dress up again..please..(looking at the basket of water near the gas stove).
(Taking clothes off)
Carrot: I am your wife, st..d (bites her tongue).
Smart book: No fight before sex, this is not healthy.
Inner voice: day dreaming? This is not healthy.
(looking for a porno movie).
Carrot: hockey again? (looking on the movie cover).
Every day, this is not healthy.
Inner voice : I want something hot baby! Give me something hot!
Carrot: ..on the gas stove..(looking at the gas stove)
Inner voice: Don’t dress up again..please..(looking at the basket of water near the gas stove).
Inner
voice : what kind of world we are living?
Everyone knows everything.
(Highlighting article 5000 ways to stay focused).
Everyone knows everything.
(Highlighting article 5000 ways to stay focused).
Inner
voice : good thing my kids are happy,
Don't know anything.
When to pick you up from school?
Don't know.
Where is the library books?
Don't know.
Where is the house keys?
Don't know.
(To Poetess ) : When is this story going to be over?
Poetess : don't know.
Inner voice (dreamingly): truly, truly, blessed people..
Don't know anything.
When to pick you up from school?
Don't know.
Where is the library books?
Don't know.
Where is the house keys?
Don't know.
(To Poetess ) : When is this story going to be over?
Poetess : don't know.
Inner voice (dreamingly): truly, truly, blessed people..
Inner voice (to his fiancé):
you should join the eating club.
And you (to Poetess): the starving club.
(Pointing hands in opposite directions): vice versa.
Inner voice ( to his fiancé): I know why we have this communiqué.
You don't surprise me any more.
I know I will have healthy breakfast every morning,
Healthy lunch, healthy dinner,
Fruits and vegetables, water, milk with honey and mint tea,
Will have a babble bath, massage,
My hands and feet will be well moisturised every night,
I will be deeply loved on Saturday...
Poetess: you should marry Dan.
Inner voice: who is Dan?
And you (to Poetess): the starving club.
(Pointing hands in opposite directions): vice versa.
Inner voice ( to his fiancé): I know why we have this communiqué.
You don't surprise me any more.
I know I will have healthy breakfast every morning,
Healthy lunch, healthy dinner,
Fruits and vegetables, water, milk with honey and mint tea,
Will have a babble bath, massage,
My hands and feet will be well moisturised every night,
I will be deeply loved on Saturday...
Poetess: you should marry Dan.
Inner voice: who is Dan?
Poetess (naked): dinner time!
Inner voice: what ... (closes eyes).
I can't do it, I can't do it! I can't look any more.
I did it five hundred times today,
Every magazine has only naked women,
How men do you think feel? Hardly alive!
Soon I will cover my eyes.
Poetess: my new diet.
Eat naked in front of the mirror.
See only one onion on the plate.
Inner voice: what ... (closes eyes).
I can't do it, I can't do it! I can't look any more.
I did it five hundred times today,
Every magazine has only naked women,
How men do you think feel? Hardly alive!
Soon I will cover my eyes.
Poetess: my new diet.
Eat naked in front of the mirror.
See only one onion on the plate.
