Don't know story

Poetess: I am happy!
Inner voice: congratulations!
Poetess: I was exercising at work and I spilled cream from Mexican salad all over my shirt.
People look at me and ask what I am doing..
I have to loose ten pounds like today.
I can't have belly and. ..(trying to clean the shirt) the same size.
Life: .. me hard so I say that you won, bring some sparks..
Grandma witch and sister witch chokes.
Poetess: with tazer?