Inner voice: Welcome
to the club!
Poetess (looking
around) : it's empty here?
Inner voice : you
are the first one.
Poetess is thinking
what to say.
Inner voice : you
are asking too many questions.
Why didn't you stay
in the forest any way?
I am sure, wild
bears would love you.
Poetess : I wanted
to work in the office.
Poetess is lying in
the bath tab and watching movie.
Paintings on the
wall, ice cream and educational magazines.
She is drinking
orange juice.
We will be nice
here.
The phone starts to
ring.
Poetess : Good day..
Inner voice : why
are you not at work?
It's Friday, lady.
Poetess : my back, I
mean my butt, my belly..
(To herself ) faking
all the time.
Inner voice : wake
up already,
We are at work
actually.
( Moving cup with
change closer to the road).
Poetess : do you
like my writing,
How I write?
Inner voice
(pretending he is dreaming): what?
Poetess : I was
thinking,
Any poets who are
living has more chances to write a beautiful story,
Like doing better
then great poets who are gone.
So I am doing better
than Shakespeare..
Inner voice : What's
your real job?
Poetess: I wrote a
story!
Inner voice: I am
sure middle aged women will be very happy.
Poetess: what middle
age?
I am not even sixty.
Inner voice: I hate
working too.
Poetess (thinking of
where to hide weights at work): what's wrong with it?
Inner voice: being a
nice person at my work is a curse.
Poetess: I read in
newspaper about some company,
Few employees got
poisoned and they sued the company.
The fridge didn't
work all weekend, first thing on Monday, bym..
Inner voice: we are
not so lucky.
Poetess: I wrote a
story (looking at the mirror) about some one else
And I think I need
professional advise about where shall I go with it.
Inner voice: I have
a friend for that.
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: what's your name boy?
Poetess: boy? Irina.
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: the mostest and importenest thing is grammar
And you have to know
what a h..eck you are talking about.
Poetess (writing):
the mostest importenest thing..
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: yes, I was surprised myself
When the nurse
started to take off my clothes.
Poetess: the nurse?
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: no, the horse was after, or before...
Let me think my
beautiful ladies.
Poetess (kind of
melting with a smile): thank you...
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: me to, I am thanking only the ambulance.
I was writing a poem
about farm,
Special edition
Mister Taker had a horse, pig, chickens and pit bulls,
I had to ride all of
them myself,
Grandma with stupid
questions, she was the last one.
Poetess: you were
riding grandma?
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: she said she was single.
We have to trust
people.
Mister Taker had
something else too, but since the children might read,
We can't talk about
any weapons, especially illegal.
It was a poem for
the police.
Nice detective, gave
me a pillow to sit down,
We were writing for
a year..
Poetess: and what
happened?
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry: Peter? who is Peter?
You?
Poetess : my name is
Irina.
Specialist in women,
dogs and poetry :
What I was doing in
the air?
I was asking this
question myself:
What I am doing in
the air with a laundry bag?
What am I doing in
the air at all.
Five minutes, lovely
conversation between birds and myself.
Wind must be changed
the direction,
That was the third
nurse explanation,
The one with wings
didn't explain anything,
Told me to get ...
out and start .. working.
And I am working my
friends,
Teaching children
and adults,
We are writing new
story
" Penguin
versus Trax, the dinosaur"..
In the bus.
Grandma witch, mama
witch and sister witch are waiting for papa witch.
Inner voice is
holding garlic, onion, carrot, potatoes, salt and paper for
protection.
Grandma witch
(knowledgeably): that's to make soup.
Inner voice mumbles
something unclear.
Sister witch: one
"dream of an idiot" came true.
Poetess: why this
bus has two different numbers on it?
Inner voice
(thinking): why do I always want more then any one else?
Poetess: I don't
know what to write here,
I don't know much
about witches,
It will be
unfinished story.
Inner voice (starts
to worry): what?
(Nicely): don't you
have few girlfriends at work.
Go, spend some time
together..
Friends to each
other: we are here to help our friend,
So stuff your face
in the mud.
Beautiful lady is
reading a book "How turn beautiful lady into a frog"
nner voice kicks the
entrance door, throws his jacket and bags with food, dog food, cat
food, hamster treats and special bag with other items on the floor
and shouts:
I am home slats!
The slats: are you
fucking out of your mind!?
Inner voice (
thinking at the same time as the slats are speaking): I fucking out
of my mind!
The sluts: let him
go to the store alone and he comes back completely insane.
Inner voice
(thinking): I am completely insane!
The sluts: he is
drunk!
Inner voice (
thinking ): I am drunk!
Hamster, cat and dog
are waiting.
Inner voice: my
beauties,
I didn't know you
are home..
I ate uncooked
mushroom I think. ..
"Smotchie kiss"
(the dog's name):
Good thing they
don't fight too long ....looove. ...
Almost my massage
time..
"Slat"
(the cat): I am pregnant.
They gave me this
name and think
I will go outside
and will mind my own business?
But with the black
cat?.. on the pine trees at the rush hour?!
I had never expected
that from myself ..
"Barbie"
(the hamster): fucking bullshit,
No one checks
anything.
Running every day in
pink clothes, in the pink wheel,
In the pink hamster
house,
And I am a fucking
boy!
Then every one
shakes me (shakes his feet like it's thunderstorm): where are the
babies?!
"Slat" (
the cat): you can play with mine..
"Smotchie kiss
" (the dog): listen Barbie..
On the set of a new movie " The Iceberg".Donald : I am your President my friends,Who do you think you are going to listen every day?(burning and ripping of papers in many pieces): good luck with finding something bad about me!Only in Hell!Nurse: are you sure we can play this story in the championship?Doctor: do we want to get a government grant or we don't want to get a government grant?Donald : they want to sell drugs .Nurse : "Bill" keeps demanding a private room,He says that he is single for a reason.Doctor: may be it's a good thing..Lady Doctor: and "Monica" is smiling all the time.Second Doctor: we have to do something,My kids are going to college this year.Nurse: I have an idea!We will include "Monica" and "Bill" in the story..Doctor nods his head in agreement and pints his pan to the nurse.On the set of a new movie " Old school".Donald : it was the best day in my life,Constitution felt on my head in the library,And here I thought,This is my last chance to do something really crazy.Hilary (reading biology book): what looks like a pig is sounds like a pig ... (with question in look) .. and will act like a pig as well.(taking a note).Donald : university degree is not free in our country!Producer : sister Hilary have you seen brother Donald?Donald : sad lipstick girl...Producer: school time!(In the class)Donald and Hilary are both looking at the map.Hilary : see, I told you, take North, I will take South,Now clearly we have a problem.On the set of a new movie "Let's wild out".Hilary: look babies!Hilary: are we staying or going?Donald (one of the women): hi sexy girl.Hilary (in spoiled baby voice, few minutes after): here!Donald (in the car) : I am driving by pushing.Hilary : are you sure we can park the car near this fire hydrant?Right here! (pointing finger on the right). (Donald pushes the car to an empty spot).On the set of a new movie " It's 3 now. It was 5 before".Donald : Plus we have plenty of water bottles in the car. Hilary : 3 of what?Donald : is there are another women in my country by chance?Donald : bombs. Hilary : where are you going? Hilary : Freedom of speech!Hilary: next year will be 1.Donald : 3 million for the health care. It was 5 before, now it's 3. Donald : people don't like anything.Men who like hot women don't like the law.Some people don't like hotdogs, they like salads. Some people don't like hot women. People who like the law don't like me.Donald : Grasias Seniora, you look great too.You can become bold by leading this nation. This why I am going to a hair salon... On the set of a new movie " True story ". Hilary: Commander and Chef!Too much time on hands, nothing much to do...Hilary : where are you going with all this ammunition? Donald (to the donkey): gated community has no clue what's going on in the world. At least I have too much time in hands (shows his hands).Practice makes perfect.See the difference...in and on.. (shows the hands again) Going to the war my dear. Hilary: with Spain? Donald : with bad people. Hilary : don't tease pregnant women with your looks. Donald : watch TV my dear.Ivana : actually I am the first lady,Hilary : people should thank you for their problems. Donald : problems is life. Imagine what life would be without problems? (Hilary makes hand sign like if a rocket goes in the sky). Voice on the sky : actually only human souls are my problem.On the set of a new movie "What to do?".By the age, year and phone number. It was 29... Hilary makes a surprised funny face. Ivana : not 1929.. It was the day when I was 29. Hilary : so when you leave to the war, Who is going to count our money? ( Donald turns back home) Donald : in case if people ask us what to do,Go to work and be happy, vitamins we provide.We don't know what to do. We, I mean us are the rich people (smiles with apology in the face). We could probably tell where to go (points hand straight), But we don't want to get sued. Hilary: ... wicked minds... Donald: it's actually was go to work. (Hilary is making a note, nodding).Lady: like all normal women I would prefer coffee in bed not be taped in the bathtub with ducks without any water on the side,Lady: one year ago I was maliciously abducted by group of wild aliens on bikes. Any new news about it? (whispering) Actually it was my husband's plan, It didn't work out and he went nuts. Hilary: sexually active men always up to something. Donald: publicity. Only stinking man asking in the dark, where is the money? Hilary : you are our hero.. Lady: that's not it.(Group of aliens with signs "She is beautiful" and "Help us" are looking in the sky and waiving red flags much harder now).Donald : I'll take a nap. Lady (in tears): waiting for my prince charming police officer to rescue me from vicious intruders and return me at least my purse. (one year ago) Vicious intruder: Wine my lady? Lady (in the bubble bath): f..k off, take my picture and leave. Donald : Sometimes I wish I was abducted by the aliens once and for all. Start my businesses on a new planet of Mars.Lady: millions of dollars were stolen from my kitchen table and never returned.Hilary : ... this where expression red flags came from..(making a note). Donald : I was left alone on the sinking ship myself, With only keys (very loud) from my house! and picture of the ocean. I wonder whose brilliant idea was that? (Few people have blushing chicks). Then Hurricane Melania hit me in the face. Hilary : I wonder how much it will cost? Donald : Oh its free... Hilary: anyway businessmen let's go to our businesses and stop talking.Donald : I am ruling the country..
