We are going to the bachelor party,
And I am giving up styling my hair,
Because I always look like a hooker or a cleaning lady.
Now my girlfriend is in my house almost without the hair.
When I looked at her first,
I only could ask:
What happened?
She mixed the bleach with the color,
And waited for 50 minutes.
I hope it wouldn't affect the marriage...
The bride got drunk before everyone else,
Now under the table.
More liqueur and strippers than guests,
I guess its time to say: "Good luck, I wish the best!"
Poems,stories and pictures by Irina Mouravleva.
My Grandmother's memories about the Second World War - pictures
Happy Birthday!
Today is a wonderful day!
Today is a wonderful day!
Today is my grandmother's aunt Birthday!
She is 98 and she is an amazing Russian woman, loving, funny, still has beauty in her, very kind, no complaints except the age (sometimes), gives her government pention to her great great great kids (I think) and still has dreams.
So there is a long road to go for everyone! All the best!
Today is my grandmother's aunt Birthday!
She is 98 and she is an amazing Russian woman, loving, funny, still has beauty in her, very kind, no complaints except the age (sometimes), gives her government pention to her great great great kids (I think) and still has dreams.
So there is a long road to go for everyone! All the best!
Shopping for a child clothes
Shopping for J.
Already know, nothing cheap looks good on him.
First, we go to men's store,
See what's new in the world.
Then we go to kids store
And buy exactly the same in size 5 or 4.
Only "big boys colors": red, black and blue.
Nothing that might have a girl in the mind.
J chooses his own everything,
One time he refused to get pants,
Didn't much the shoes.
He picks himself T-shirt and shorts,
Tells what he has to wear.
I ask, how do you know,
You are not even four.
J likes to dance, has a girlfriend,
A little Jessica who tells me everything about him.
Knows how to kiss and plays basketball and soccer almost like a pro.
His shoes only Geox, only one my request,
J's - must have lights and look cool.
I say nothing, he is a boy,
Especially now,
When he's graduated from the Preschool 2.
Already know, nothing cheap looks good on him.
First, we go to men's store,
See what's new in the world.
Then we go to kids store
And buy exactly the same in size 5 or 4.
Only "big boys colors": red, black and blue.
Nothing that might have a girl in the mind.
J chooses his own everything,
One time he refused to get pants,
Didn't much the shoes.
He picks himself T-shirt and shorts,
Tells what he has to wear.
I ask, how do you know,
You are not even four.
J likes to dance, has a girlfriend,
A little Jessica who tells me everything about him.
Knows how to kiss and plays basketball and soccer almost like a pro.
His shoes only Geox, only one my request,
J's - must have lights and look cool.
I say nothing, he is a boy,
Especially now,
When he's graduated from the Preschool 2.
The date story
Today my friend Kery
Begged me to go on a date with her and her new boyfriend.
May be I could see what she doesn't want to see.
May be I could talk.
Fine, but I should have brought a huge bottle of wine.
The "boyfriend" was okay except he was touching himself in weird way,
Almost all the time.
Still I decided to stay, wait for another surprise.
The surprise didn't wait for too long.
First was his life story,
What his parents did wrong
When he was 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12,
Thirteen year was nice (one more surprise),
was horrible 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23,
24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 34,
Thirty five was fine (slept with a woman for the first time),
36, 37 were bad, then now (finally) 38.
Sorry, but this how the date went.
Glad he didn't start from one month,
I don't think the wine I didn't buy would last.
Then he talked about his boss,
Who asked to work at work
(Crazy boss).
Then was the fiance of one day,
Who didn't call back and left from the window door (was the first floor).
The gold fish did not want to eat,
A dog barked somewhere...
I ended the date right there:
Kery, wake up (she was sleeping in the salad)
End his misery right now,
Where is the fork?
Begged me to go on a date with her and her new boyfriend.
May be I could see what she doesn't want to see.
May be I could talk.
Fine, but I should have brought a huge bottle of wine.
The "boyfriend" was okay except he was touching himself in weird way,
Almost all the time.
Still I decided to stay, wait for another surprise.
The surprise didn't wait for too long.
First was his life story,
What his parents did wrong
When he was 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12,
Thirteen year was nice (one more surprise),
was horrible 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23,
24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 34,
Thirty five was fine (slept with a woman for the first time),
36, 37 were bad, then now (finally) 38.
Sorry, but this how the date went.
Glad he didn't start from one month,
I don't think the wine I didn't buy would last.
Then he talked about his boss,
Who asked to work at work
(Crazy boss).
Then was the fiance of one day,
Who didn't call back and left from the window door (was the first floor).
The gold fish did not want to eat,
A dog barked somewhere...
I ended the date right there:
Kery, wake up (she was sleeping in the salad)
End his misery right now,
Where is the fork?
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just a thought
My friend fifteen years old niece is crying.
A boy at school called her a slut.
It should be a compliment.
At sixty,
The boys will tell you:
Get out old pal.
All the best to everyone:)
A boy at school called her a slut.
It should be a compliment.
At sixty,
The boys will tell you:
Get out old pal.
All the best to everyone:)
Just a thought
My I sister asks me every day
What's "the news of the day".
Today " new" -
I forgot to wear a skirt to work.
Everyone was like "wow"
What is it,
A new style?
Got lots of compliments too.
What's "the news of the day".
Today " new" -
I forgot to wear a skirt to work.
Everyone was like "wow"
What is it,
A new style?
Got lots of compliments too.
A few thoughts
I grow up on the street, but the dirt did not stick to me.
It did not make me be mad at life, at people,
It did not make me bad, not love and believe.
1990, the end of the Soviet Union era,
The end of my parents marriage.
All they were been doing is fighting about everything
Like like they never loved each other,
Like me and my sister were not around.
They forgot everything.
One time my mother broke all the dishes in the house,
The floor was white.
Then she wanted to drink,
I returned from school again and again,
She was drunk, could not even speak.
Then I broke everything else, the furniture, the windows,
I took a hammer, my mom got scared, and never drink ever since.
Then my father's second wife would not leave me alone,
Begging for forgiveness on her knees for stealing my papa all over the city.
My mom got a boyfriend, needed the house.
My sister had to live with my grandmother for a year.
I was left alone on the street.
I found the true freedom, the freedom of mind.
I was shy, but I could lead.
I have met old Russian women who could heal anything just with a touch of the hand,
Just with the hug.
I met a man who could talk to the sky, wind the trees.
And everyone was very kind to me.
I went to school, our teacher was a Church painter
And at fourteen I believed in God on my own...
It did not make me be mad at life, at people,
It did not make me bad, not love and believe.
1990, the end of the Soviet Union era,
The end of my parents marriage.
All they were been doing is fighting about everything
Like like they never loved each other,
Like me and my sister were not around.
They forgot everything.
One time my mother broke all the dishes in the house,
The floor was white.
Then she wanted to drink,
I returned from school again and again,
She was drunk, could not even speak.
Then I broke everything else, the furniture, the windows,
I took a hammer, my mom got scared, and never drink ever since.
Then my father's second wife would not leave me alone,
Begging for forgiveness on her knees for stealing my papa all over the city.
My mom got a boyfriend, needed the house.
My sister had to live with my grandmother for a year.
I was left alone on the street.
I found the true freedom, the freedom of mind.
I was shy, but I could lead.
I have met old Russian women who could heal anything just with a touch of the hand,
Just with the hug.
I met a man who could talk to the sky, wind the trees.
And everyone was very kind to me.
I went to school, our teacher was a Church painter
And at fourteen I believed in God on my own...
The Ketchup Story
My friend has a daughter just turned sixteen.
On every girl's birthday I get s gift of my dream.
The story goes back sixteen years ago,
We were naive, didn't much know.
And this my friend meet a man of her dream.
Everything was perfect until he said
She has to be first for him, and he as well.
It was a problem, but I always believe if we have a chance, we go for it.
The ketchup was my idea.
I wrote a few lines,
She mixed with the wine.
It was a perfect love story,
A piece of art.
Two liters bottle was gone,
The ketchup was everywhere,
On his head, on the lamps, on the floor.
(He believed).
And nine months after the little girl was born.
Now she is sixteen.
Who can say the tomato ketchup is not a beautiful thing.
On every girl's birthday I get s gift of my dream.
The story goes back sixteen years ago,
We were naive, didn't much know.
And this my friend meet a man of her dream.
Everything was perfect until he said
She has to be first for him, and he as well.
It was a problem, but I always believe if we have a chance, we go for it.
The ketchup was my idea.
I wrote a few lines,
She mixed with the wine.
It was a perfect love story,
A piece of art.
Two liters bottle was gone,
The ketchup was everywhere,
On his head, on the lamps, on the floor.
(He believed).
And nine months after the little girl was born.
Now she is sixteen.
Who can say the tomato ketchup is not a beautiful thing.
The Farm Story
My mom called me last night:
Can you invest little more money in my farm...
What about the money I sent already?
She was like, we have a little problem on the farm over here.
My mom and her friend had a thought,
I think in a crazy dream at night,
The free "retired doctor" life is not the same without big fight.
The farm was the brilliant idea.
They got chickens, ducks, goats, few pigs and a cow.
So they can make lots of money.
To make money farming, it sad to say,
But you have to "finish the farming" on not very good day.
Everyone was happy until the time to say the animals good bye.
My brother- in- law refused right away,
In no life he will run after the pig with a knife.
My mother's friend, already " an idiot son- in- law" now was the last hope, the "main killer" they all believed in.
It was one big dream.
Well, he had a heart attack trying to kill the pig.
One month in the hospital, two at home,
Diapers require, dinner in bed.
He might not be the same after all.
All with him now is mad mama - in- law,
Very much everyday.
But the pig is okay.
Everyone worries about that pig first for some way.
Can you invest little more money in my farm...
What about the money I sent already?
She was like, we have a little problem on the farm over here.
My mom and her friend had a thought,
I think in a crazy dream at night,
The free "retired doctor" life is not the same without big fight.
The farm was the brilliant idea.
They got chickens, ducks, goats, few pigs and a cow.
So they can make lots of money.
To make money farming, it sad to say,
But you have to "finish the farming" on not very good day.
Everyone was happy until the time to say the animals good bye.
My brother- in- law refused right away,
In no life he will run after the pig with a knife.
My mother's friend, already " an idiot son- in- law" now was the last hope, the "main killer" they all believed in.
It was one big dream.
Well, he had a heart attack trying to kill the pig.
One month in the hospital, two at home,
Diapers require, dinner in bed.
He might not be the same after all.
All with him now is mad mama - in- law,
Very much everyday.
But the pig is okay.
Everyone worries about that pig first for some way.
Just a thought
This new manager
Walking around,
Steering at every thing and every one,
Hope one day
He will see a miracle to come.
Walking around,
Steering at every thing and every one,
Hope one day
He will see a miracle to come.
My song
(Intro) (dialog)
I want to be like a feather...
What? You want to be fat?
No! Like a feather!
(Chorus)
I used to be like many women in the world,
Just happy with the little I got.
I followed my mothers steps when being free
Had no sense.
Verse 1
I used to wake up every morning mad,
Thinking what else I forget.
Go straight to wash tons of dishes
Like a woman without ambitions
Who joined cleaning cult.
Get a phone call from my mom:
I live my life wrong,
Look at the mirror,
Repeat like a parrot -
I 'm strong,
I'm strong!
Then drive to work like I am in the best racing team.
See couple of people who jealous of me.
I tried to blend in, be part of the team.
No mini, no make up, no being unique.
I was thinking of women still complaining of me.
But something was shining,
People followed me.
I gave them the hope,
At least daily laugh.
Of course I denied being pretty and smart.
And really, I almost blend in.
Until I looked at the eyes,
The eyes of the Queen.
(Chorus)
Verse 2
The beautiful woman,
Hot, sexy and free.
She looked straight at me:
What's wrong with you,
Are fucking blind.
Don't tell me you've been drinking all vodka
In the world for the last hundred nights.
Can't you see?
Open your eyes.
Once again,
Can't you see!
Can't you see you are me!
I want to be like a feather...
What? You want to be fat?
No! Like a feather!
(Chorus)
I used to be like many women in the world,
Just happy with the little I got.
I followed my mothers steps when being free
Had no sense.
Verse 1
I used to wake up every morning mad,
Thinking what else I forget.
Go straight to wash tons of dishes
Like a woman without ambitions
Who joined cleaning cult.
Get a phone call from my mom:
I live my life wrong,
Look at the mirror,
Repeat like a parrot -
I 'm strong,
I'm strong!
Then drive to work like I am in the best racing team.
See couple of people who jealous of me.
I tried to blend in, be part of the team.
No mini, no make up, no being unique.
I was thinking of women still complaining of me.
But something was shining,
People followed me.
I gave them the hope,
At least daily laugh.
Of course I denied being pretty and smart.
And really, I almost blend in.
Until I looked at the eyes,
The eyes of the Queen.
(Chorus)
Verse 2
The beautiful woman,
Hot, sexy and free.
She looked straight at me:
What's wrong with you,
Are fucking blind.
Don't tell me you've been drinking all vodka
In the world for the last hundred nights.
Can't you see?
Open your eyes.
Once again,
Can't you see!
Can't you see you are me!
Mister Moon (my song for my little friend)
Mister Moon.
Mister Moon on the sky,
Mister Moon so high on the sky.
All I want have two wings to fly
And kiss Mister Moon good night.
Good night Mister Moon,
Good night.
Have a lovely, lovely night.
I will see you again tomorrow night.
Mister Moon when you will shine
On other part of our world,
Can you please visit my grandma's home,
And grandpa's, and aunty and uncle, great grandma and many cousins of mine.
Tell I smiled "Good night" and I love them all.
Many kisses to follow.
Good night Mister Moon,
Good night!
Have a lovely, lovely night.
I will see you again tomorrow night.
Mister Moon on the sky,
Mister Moon so high on the sky.
All I want have two wings to fly
And kiss Mister Moon good night.
Good night Mister Moon,
Good night.
Have a lovely, lovely night.
I will see you again tomorrow night.
Mister Moon when you will shine
On other part of our world,
Can you please visit my grandma's home,
And grandpa's, and aunty and uncle, great grandma and many cousins of mine.
Tell I smiled "Good night" and I love them all.
Many kisses to follow.
Good night Mister Moon,
Good night!
Have a lovely, lovely night.
I will see you again tomorrow night.
The divorce story
A few months ago my girlfriend's husband told her that he wants to go back to Russia forever, he hates her after thirty years of marriage, hates Canada, wants all the money, work on a farm and see his cousins every day...
My girlfriend was sad, depressed, crying non stop, thinking to shoot him or shoot herself, never ever trust a man.
And anything I would tell her: move on with your own life, go out, go see professional help, give him what he wants, be nice, start all over again. She would listen and agree, but later go to her usuall depressed self.
Finally I said:"Fuck him!" She got it and she did it, became bubly, exated and mostly thinking of dating again. Plus she paid a down payment for her own apartment. She was like:" I can't wait for the divorce, I am so exited!"
On Saturday we went out and she told me that her husband has changed his mind...
My girlfriend was sad, depressed, crying non stop, thinking to shoot him or shoot herself, never ever trust a man.
And anything I would tell her: move on with your own life, go out, go see professional help, give him what he wants, be nice, start all over again. She would listen and agree, but later go to her usuall depressed self.
Finally I said:"Fuck him!" She got it and she did it, became bubly, exated and mostly thinking of dating again. Plus she paid a down payment for her own apartment. She was like:" I can't wait for the divorce, I am so exited!"
On Saturday we went out and she told me that her husband has changed his mind...
Singing misery
This colleague of mine likes to sing at work,
But she is singing like a wolf on the moon.And there is no any hope at all.
I understand when you at home,
Sing what ever you want.
It's a free world when you're alone.
Every day I tell her "wow" and clap loud
When I really want to say
"Not that shit again!"
When the baby is sick - a story
The baby is sick today! Cough and runny nose! Mamma Mia!
Mommy went to buy "fresh" medicine first. Then she bought honey, then the baby's favorite cereal, then food and fruits, brought it all home. Then went back to buy candies, new lighting Geox running shoes with a dianasour and Team Jordan T-shirt and pants (the baby likes to dress cool).
The baby told a new toy will make him not be sick and mommy bought a new race truck with little spinning cars and a bouncy blue ball, because the baby made a wish on his eye lush.
MacDonald's and the new Ninja movie helped the most! Raphael the red Ninja beat up the bad mister Cough and mister Kizia (runny nose)!
The baby is feeling much better now!
Mommy went to buy "fresh" medicine first. Then she bought honey, then the baby's favorite cereal, then food and fruits, brought it all home. Then went back to buy candies, new lighting Geox running shoes with a dianasour and Team Jordan T-shirt and pants (the baby likes to dress cool).
The baby told a new toy will make him not be sick and mommy bought a new race truck with little spinning cars and a bouncy blue ball, because the baby made a wish on his eye lush.
MacDonald's and the new Ninja movie helped the most! Raphael the red Ninja beat up the bad mister Cough and mister Kizia (runny nose)!
The baby is feeling much better now!
just a thought
6 in the morning, ring, ring!
Go outside, have a walk, a ran,
Sing to the birds,
Smile to sanrise,
Think!
Bad is not to do something bad,
Bad is not to do anything.
So get out, walk (if you cannot ran yet), smile and dream (doesn't rhyme, but who cares)!
All the best!
Go outside, have a walk, a ran,
Sing to the birds,
Smile to sanrise,
Think!
Bad is not to do something bad,
Bad is not to do anything.
So get out, walk (if you cannot ran yet), smile and dream (doesn't rhyme, but who cares)!
All the best!
Prik- skok (jump baby!)
Jaden likes to jump on the bed and I wrote it for the "jumpy time".
Prik - skok,
Prik - skok!
Tra ta ta,
Tra ta ta!
Three tatushki,
Three ta ta.
Three kvakyshki,
Three kva - kva.
Three xru xrushki,
Three xru - xru.
Three pampyshki,
Three pampy!
Three kykyshku,
Three ky - ky!
Prik - skok,
Prik - skok!
Tra ta ta,
Tra ta ta!
Three tatushki,
Three ta ta.
Three kvakyshki,
Three kva - kva.
Three xru xrushki,
Three xru - xru.
Three pampyshki,
Three pampy!
Three kykyshku,
Three ky - ky!
Cleaning by the baby
In the evening my son Jaden was cleaning his play room, sorting his toys and books, putting away the movies.
Then he asked me if he can rip a paper? I said fine, you can rip it.
He was ripping and ripping, asking what else to rip.
In a few minutes I went to see how he was doing and I looked, J ripped all the money from my bag.
I started to laugh for some reason: "What are you doing! Its the money!" and J started to laugh, asking if it was very funny and give him more money....
Then he asked me if he can rip a paper? I said fine, you can rip it.
He was ripping and ripping, asking what else to rip.
In a few minutes I went to see how he was doing and I looked, J ripped all the money from my bag.
I started to laugh for some reason: "What are you doing! Its the money!" and J started to laugh, asking if it was very funny and give him more money....
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